A Letter from Chris Suarez
ON THE NIGHT BEFORE...
So tomorrow I finally get to run the NYC Marathon. The past couple months of training have been an awesome learning experience on quite a few levels. I am certain that most of the learning will be experienced tomorrow, but that will have to be left for next week. I spent some time this evening reflecting on what I’ve learned on the journey.
Things Never Go As Planned
I was the guy that printed out the Peloton training schedule. I intended to follow the schedule, check off the boxes, get all the training in. The last couple months were not perfect.The weeks didn’t line up as I had thought they would. I got called out of town at times. I was away from my normal gym and routes at other times.The slightly torn meniscus that I was certain would be just “fine”, definitely is telling me it is not “fine.” And all of that is ok. Because nothing ever goes perfectly according to plan. I’d like it to, but funny how the world doesn’t lay out in front of me as I’d like it to.
It's Always Hard To Be Motivated For Something Unnecessary
I didn’t have to run the marathon. No one forced me to. On top of that, I’m not easily driven by social pressure or outside influence, so even after I posted publicly that I was running it, that isn’t something that would keep me moving forward. Necessity is the greatest motivator. When there is no choice, humans have a way of showing up and getting it done. When we lack necessity commitment is harder to come by. It’s easy to find the excuse as to why you don’t have to be on the treadmill at 5am. It’s easy to convince yourself that breaking the running schedule this week is not a big deal. It’s easy to decide to do something that seems more important than “it would be cool to” items on your list. With that said, many of us don’t live a life of necessity in this country. I learned the valuable lesson of combining each goal with a need to accomplish, otherwise it is all too easy to skip the activity, press next, or tell yourself you will do it next time.
This Was A Selfish Goal
I wanted to run this marathon. It was a personal goal. It didn’t move the needle on my business. It didn’t move the needle on my family. In my mind, it immediately made it selfish. So at times I felt I should stop in exchange for more time with the kids or more time in the office. I wasn’t working to create a better future for the family, or create opportunities for those that I work with that I promised to bring down a path to their preferred future. This was really just for me. I suppose it was my preferred future and for that reason I almost stopped training a few times. With that said, it was a lesson that it was ok to have a selfish goal. Along the way I also was able to translate this selfish goal into family lessons on health and exercise and learn a few business lessons that I hope will move the needle.
Comparison is Meaningless
Comparing what you do to what others do has no merit and adds no value to my life. Thousands of runners will finish before me. Thousands will finish after me. It makes me no less than those before and no more than those after. Last month a human broke the world record for the fastest time completing a marathon - it took him just 2 hours and 1 second. I was in awe as I watched that. I clearly didn’t compare myself to him. But over the past few months I've had other friends run marathons, complete Ironman’s, or complete other physical feats. I found myself telling myself I was training for “just” a marathon. I was minimizing a goal that I set and wanted to accomplish based on what others were setting as goals and accomplishing. There is no value in that - in either life or business. So just stop it.
Drive Can Be Healthy Or Unhealthy
When I initially committed to running my first marathon in over 17 years I set a goal to run it at an 8:30 mile pace. As I was getting through my training I found myself hitting 10 miles and then 15 mile and then 20 miles at a 7:45 mile pace. That became my new goal. Then I found out I could qualify for the Boston Marathon if I ran it in 3 hours and 10 minutes or the next NYC Marathon if I could run it in 2 hours and 58 minutes. That became my new goal. The reality is, I was setting slightly unachievable goals for myself - in effect pushing the goal post out and setting myself up to be disappointed in my results on race day. The drive was becoming unhealthy.
I had to refocus on why I did this. Ultimately, I love New York City and I love running. Combining the two was a bit of a home coming for me. Sure, I’m driven by goals. But this marathon wasn’t for that, so I needed to allow myself to run it without one. This was just for me. I decided to leave race pace goals behind and made a commitment to myself.
At set points in the race I have agreed to ask myself, Am proud of how I am running? Am I proud of how I started the race? Am I proud of how I crossed the Queensboro bridge? Am I proud of how I’m pushing through some pain? Am I proud of how my race is shaping up? If so, just enjoy it.
At the same time along the way, I agreed to ask myself, At the finish line will I wish that I had run a little faster? At the finish line will I wish that I felt that run a little more? At the finish line will I wish I to re-run a portion of that race differently? At the finish line will I be proud of how I pushed? If so, then ill push a little harder, and just enjoy it.
That is it. It’s that simple. That works for me based on who I am and how I push and how I intend to show up. I want to be proud of how I showed up.
That is what I planned. That is what motivates me. That is my selfish goal. That will be my comparison. That is healthy for me.
On the eve before the NYC Marathon, honestly I’m just happy to be healthy, happy to be here, and happy to see my wife and kids at the end of the race to show them that I’m still willing to start new things, do hard things, and keep promises to them and me.
Chris