A Letter from Chris Suarez
COME ON. BE HONEST
Honesty is a non-negotiable for me. Relationships are built on trust. It doesn’t mean that relationships are over when mistakes are made or bad judgment is used. But honesty is the non-negotiable. Whether it’s a big deal or a little deal, a big mistake or little mistake, a big opportunity or little opportunity, a big win or a little win - honesty is key.
Think about your close friends. Think about your partners. Think about your clients. Think about your family. In any real relationship that is worth building and developing, you must have a rhythm and history of honesty.
But what about yourself? Are you honest with yourself? At times we may be so committed to being honest with everyone around us, and the one person we keep lying to, is ourselves.
Tell yourself the truth. If you don’t, unknowingly you could be lying to everyone else around you as well.
Are you telling yourself you are giving your all, when maybe there is more to give?
Are you telling yourself you’re tired, when you’re really not?
Are you telling yourself you tried your best, when you know it wasn’t quite there?
Are you telling yourself you care, when you don’t?
Are you telling yourself it is important to you, when it isn’t?
Are you telling yourself you are willing, when you aren’t?
Unfortunately some of the most honest people wake up and lie to themselves every day. It may start small, but it snowballs. How can that happen?
We tell ourselves that the goal we set really means something to us. But it really doesn’t.
We commit to doing an activity in order to hit that goal. But we don’t make that commitment strong.
We say we will show up and play all in. But some days we do and some days we don’t.
We paint the picture of the person we want to be. But we don’t want to do what that person does.
The biggest danger isn’t the first lie. Perhaps the first one was pure optimism. The danger is the third or fourth or fifth. We begin to allow ourselves to believe anything and everything we say. We stop keeping promises to ourselves too easily. Before we know it, we are the most honest liars we know. It’s never our intent. The missed promises to ourselves today begin to give permission to miss future promises.
And so it goes. Those that believed they could count on us, no longer can. And not because we lied to them - but because we lied to ourselves.
Be honest. Be a promise keeper to others. And be a promise keeper to yourself.
Chris