A Letter from Chris Suarez
BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE LETTERS “W” and “E”
At times it’s funny what a difference one letter can make.
The difference between: Dead and Read, Die and Dye, Food and Wood.
The difference one word can make is even more consequential. One word has the power to affect an individual, a team, or an entire organization. Enter stage left: the word “We”. Enter stage right: the word “They”.
When we consistently use the word “we”, it shows a sense of belonging. It takes down walls. It creates connection. It tells yourself and those around you that you are in it together, you are playing on the same team, you are one part of a real partnership, a piece of something bigger.
Conversely when we consistently use the word “they”, it demonstrates a disconnect. It builds walls. It tells yourself and those around you that you are on different sides, opposing teams, have different agendas. It creates separation.
Think about how this shows up on Sunday afternoon. When your favorite team is winning, we want to be a part of that. We feel that even as a fan we contributed to the trophy. We begin to use possessive language, letting the opposing fans know that “we played well”, or “we won”, or “we took home the championship.” In contrast, when your favorite team loses, perhaps missing that final field goal, we often find ourselves looking for a bit of separation from that loss - using detached language, such as “they just didn’t execute well,” or “they looked really tired,” or “I can’t believe they blew it.”
These two simple words give an individual and potentially an entire organization a glimpse into the underlying culture of the team or company. As the leader of any team or business, listen to your own language and the language of those around you to get a pulse on the health of the group. Build a “we culture”. We win together, we lose together, we grow together, we get through challenges together, we figure things out, and we work things out.
The health of any organization, the success of any team, and fulfilment of any individual will be determined by how much you use the word “we” in day-to-day conversations, how often it shows up in your thought patterns, and how consistent you are in finding and understanding your place in the world.
Real relationships and deep personal connection are necessary, yet sorely lacking in business. It’s the difference between we and they. A recent Harvard Health Study, examining data from more than 309,000 people, found that lack of strong relationships increased the risk of premature death from all causes by 50% — an effect on mortality risk roughly comparable to smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day.
Close relationships cause Oxytocin to be released into our body to help facilitate bonding. Concurrently it also inhibits release of the hormone cortisol, reducing the negative effects of stress on our body. It has beneficial effects on our coronary arteries, gut function, insulin regulation, and the immune system. Put simply “we” versus “they” can save your business and your life.
If you begin to hear the word “they” slipping into the language of your team or group, it’s a sign that a wall may be getting built. Detachment occurs. Division occurs. Distance occurs. When you replace that with the word “we”, possession shows up. Inclusion shows up. Ownership shows up. We all want to feel part of something. We all want to belong. That isn’t weakness. It’s what makes humans, well, humans.
A team, business, or organization built on real partnerships is built on WE.
Two little letters. One massive concept.
WE got this.
Chris